2016 Update: I care more about this blog than I do that "they" can read it, otherwise I'd stop writing it and create a new one. As long as they finally leave me and my little family alone, there should be no problem, even though I requested that they don't read it. Since they have no interest in my writing, I'm probably safe. I hope so hard they will finally respect our wishes of no contact. I care so much about telling the truth and bringing healing. I fought my entire life to bring communication, truth, and healing to my FOO. There's nothing left to fight for so I have given up, at age 59. I can now only bring healing to myself and other survivors through my words. I finally went back to work on my heart-wrenching memoir that I wrote in 2012 that I originally wrote for them as my last Hope of getting my beloved family of origin and relatives back. But, There Are None So Blind As Those Who Will Not See

Saturday, August 15, 2015

It Can Be Really Hard To Love

I don't mind sharing my secrets
I never did like secrets or lies
I'd never share other people's secrets
Other people's secrets are theirs
  to do with as they choose

I'm hurting a bit right now
I just got to speak to my twin soul
  (or the next closest thing to him if it's not him)
First time in a few weeks I think

Everyone close to me knows about him
I've only recently revealed hints about him
   to the world

We're star crossed
No doubt about that

I may never see him again
Who knows
We haven't seen each other for over a decade

It's the most above-board friendship it could be
   now
It didn't used to be
It used to be quite a bit more than that
Oh How Things Change

I am here writing this like self therapy

I don't think I'll ever have sex or love again.....



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