I don't want this disease. I didn't ask for this disease. I can't cure this disease.
I can't pretend like this disease doesn't exist like most of humanity does. I pretend as often as I possibly can. I pretend I'm healthy to please you. And myself, for that matter.
I wish I could give you what you want and pretend like I don't have it all the time.
Then maybe you wouldn't be afraid to talk to me.
But for now, I'm spending another beautiful weekend just sitting alone and not pretending which is why I'm blogging. I am physically unable to do anything else today, just as most of my days.
I also watch TV, write, go on Facebook, and read when my impaired cognitive abilities and eyes allow.
I wish you could see me---no, I mean Really SEE me. Just Once. Just one time.
I wish you could care and send your love.
But you can't, for whatever reasons, or else you surely would.
ME ON A TYPICAL DAY
