What has transpired for me and alcohol could be called nothing short of a miracle -- and thought I'd blog about that!
A long history of alcohol abuse and perhaps alcoholism has completely transformed into something so healthy on all levels. Not only my relationship with alcohol but to any stigma I carried about drinking and about recovery groups.
I don't really know how I got here -- must be something mystical -- I'm totally free from any and all attachment OR judgment about booze. I can take it or leave it and I prefer to leave it. It's just not in my thinking or on my radar.
I have no fear whatsoever about drinking. I used to have a shitload of fear about drinking. During "sobriety periods" in and out of 10 recovery organizations over three decades, I'd fear like crazy drinking again. Like something bad would happen to me if I drank or "slipped." And it would ruin my life. And it would destroy any sober living I'd achieved. And it would send me deep into uncontrollable drinking. I own all those thoughts and feelings; I don't blame anyone or anything for putting them in my head.
So, here I am today, 2 1/2 years as a Sobrietist, and I make my own rules about that, as we all should. Alcohol is not a friend per se, but it's not my enemy any longer either. I posted before about my pattern, if you can call it that, of drinking a few times a year whenever the spirit moves me, and that I drink no more than two drinks, and over a period of a few hours. Not sure I went into that kind of detail before, but that's them (the details).
I enjoy it OK, but truly not like I enjoy not drinking! It serves a purpose to relax me and alter my consciousness a bit and make me feel like I'm celebrating myself, which we all need to do more of; not drinking, celebrating ourselves. What I enjoy the most about those drinks is that I CAN enjoy them and that I CAN drink them. I worship the Freedom I have. I mean, I and the Powers That Be totally transformed ME! That's a Powerful accomplishment that I'm truly learning to trust in! I know there are many people in the world -- people who are Awakening, or Ascending, or whatever you want to all it -- who know exactly what I'm experiencing and talking about. I'm not that unique.
I've made my blog more public now and that's why this bears writing about and explaining. It's a follow-up to my post pre-public back in November when I wrote about enjoying some vodka. I haven't had drinks since then and don't plan to any time soon. Those two drinks were structured, by the way, with Structured Water. And structuring drinks makes them good for you, or at least not harmful, according to the inventor of the devices who is a scientist and physicist. There's more about that on my website. There are no hangovers with structured drinks. That's what they tell me; I would never drink more than two so I'll never know. It's because of my history, mostly, that I'd never drink more than one or two. My history and my physiology. And my choice and desire.
It's the being that I am today: Health conscious; very careful what she eats and drinks and says and thinks. Not a puritan and not a fanatic, just me.
