Major Revelation For My Readers (?)

Hello.

I Haven't Had Sex For Over A Decade.

What?!



Do you want to know the story?

I Can't Give Up Hope

In This Lifetime
Somehow He And I Will Be Together
Against All Odds

God! I Love To Write! -- Late Bloomer Alert

Ahh, blog, you are sooo safe on account of my having so few readers! 

You are my living private and personal journal.

I can say practically anything I want to here.

My late father, the Methodist minister who sexually abused me, used to call me a "late bloomer." Well, he wasn't kidding. I Am a late bloomer.

Perhaps I will truly write something remarkable one day. (My memoir is mostly written, so that's something)(and I hear it's pretty damn fabulous from those who have read it)

Perhaps I will even get published (not that I haven't been published, I have).

Perhaps I will even make Money from my writing one day.
Wouldn't that be something!? !


I have always known that there is something Holding Me Back from Setting Myself Free as a writer
and just Writing. Just Doing it.

Fuck.

In the meantime, there's my used-to-be-a-secret-other-blog, that I did mention before, and that has many, many, many more readers than this blog:

www.jayarainbowangel.blogspot.com

It Can Be Really Hard To Love

I don't mind sharing my secrets
I never did like secrets or lies
I'd never share other people's secrets
Other people's secrets are theirs
  to do with as they choose

I'm hurting a bit right now
I just got to speak to my twin soul
  (or the next closest thing to him if it's not him)
First time in a few weeks I think

Everyone close to me knows about him
I've only recently revealed hints about him
   to the world

We're star crossed
No doubt about that

I may never see him again
Who knows
We haven't seen each other for over a decade

It's the most above-board friendship it could be
   now
It didn't used to be
It used to be quite a bit more than that
Oh How Things Change

I am here writing this like self therapy

I don't think I'll ever have sex or love again.....

My Not-A-Secret-No-Mo! Other Blog!

  Enjoy!
  Learn!
  Share with others struggling with addiction or weakness!

  www.jayarainbowangel.blogspot.com 

For You, Robin

Denial is a finger of blame pointing toward another. 

Conflict is an expectation imposed onto another. 

Frustration is the inability to control the will of another. 

Sadness is a dependency on another. 

Loneliness is waiting for another to arrive. 

Solitude is freedom from needing another. 

Harmony is embracing the uniqueness of another. 

Grace is seeing there is no other. 

Enlightenment is when the subjects of one and another disappear. 

Love is what remains throughout it all.

~ Matt Kahn

 

I've Been Trying To Tell People This For 18 Years. Great Article.

   Chronic Fatigue Syndrome Found Worse Than Diabetes, Multiple Sclerosis, Cancer, etc.

It IS Hard Having ME/CFS, It's Really, Really Hard

And sometimes it feels good to VENT and COMPLAIN and HAVE A SELF PITY PARTY.