Another Turn For The Worst --- But Perhaps Now Personal Healing Can Continue

I had the worst nightmares, and when I woke up, I Woke Up --- and realized HOPE is FUTILE.

My mother, sister and brother will NEVER admit the abuse that happened, and they will NEVER read "The Courage To Heal" which could bring healing to us.

I had almost forgotten that they continue to allow my nieces and nephew to be turned against me believing I made false accusations of abuse! I Adore those kids, and they adored me growing up!
I'm So Heartbroken.
There are no words.

I'm allowing my ANGER out here: FUCK YOU, YOU STUPID, STUPID NARCISSISTIC PEOPLE!!!!!!!

I'm In So Much Emotional And Psychic Pain I Really Don't Know How I'm Going To Endure It

Another Cross-Post From My Other Blog

  I don't intend on doing cross-posting too much.

    Yesterday's Relief ... Today's Grieving Process

My Post This Morning From My Other Blog

  About The Sad End Of The Road With My Family

 

One Of The Main Problems

Is that my FOO are a bunch of narcissists.
Therefore, they are incapable of hearing anything negative about themselves, no matter how lovingly you try to talk about something that hurt you deeply that they said or did.
They just get defensive and blow you off with more insults.

You really can't win with narcissists.
And they can't change...
And that's the part I need to accept.

I need to just give up.
And let them go.

I don't think even a Miracle can help us.

I Tried To Say Goodbye, And That Was Before Yesterday's Post

They sucked me back in

Different kinds of exchanges yesterday

Mostly positive

Then my sister bullied me, as always

Tried to point it out to all of them this morning in our group text messages thread from yesterday
so we could get some healing and understanding

She told me to fuck off (not in so many words) and never contact her again


And So It Always Goes


Together they will write me off as crazy and the cause of all the problems in the family

They have each other and I have no one
As always


They will NEVER talk about anything
It's so much easier for them to keep me the scapegoat like they've done since I was a child



If ONLY A Miracle Could Happen

Where Was I?!...

Somethin's Happnin' Here

Betwix my FOO (family of origin) and I

.....

!!!!!


To   Be    Continued....

(an older pic. roses from me to my mom): 

Something's Gotta Give

My hurt and grief over my FOO (family of origin) is becoming too much for me to bear.

I don't think I can continue to carry-on with them like nothing is wrong and all is well.

All is Not well. All is still unresolved and unaddressed.

It's eating me up alive inside.

All I've Ever Wanted And Asked For Is Communication And Healing.


I just don't know what to do now.
I just got them back in my life early this year.
How can I lose them again?....not that I ever really had them, that's the problem.


Calling All Angels! We Need A Miracle!

Silliness

But I woke up with my answer: No, I'm not Robin Hood. I feel an attack of conscience when I steal from the rich to give to the poor; metaphorically speaking. But there are a myriad of ways to do that realistically.

OK, so, end of private joke. <wink>